Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Kollywood Megastars in Hollywood

A. Sylvester Stallone - Vijaykanth aka "Vijaykallone"
1. "Rambo" will be renamed as "Dumbo" and will feature the song "mutham thara yetha idam..?". Vijaykanth will be made to fight in the jungles bare handed with a beautiful heroine like Roja/Ranjitha held as captive by taliban. He will assault and catch Bin-Laden in this movie single handedly. He will be taken to court for killing OSAMA where he will freed by Indian court.

2. "Rocky" will become "Kalluli Mangan" & will have Goundamani as the trainer. The storyline revolves around a policeofficer who becomes a boxer who becomes a hitman like robinhood. The punch of this movie will be vijaykanth's knockout punch without touching the opponent in the boxing ring. Movie will get oscar for stunts. Captain will then compete for US president election.

B. Keanu Reaves - Simbu aka "Kena reaves"

1. "Matrix" will be "Parakum Kalai" and will still have dialogues against Dhanush and Aishwayra. There will be a special role for "T.Rajendar" to act as "Dhaadi (bearded) Morpheus" who will dance for one kuthu song.

2. "Little Buddha" will be named "Kettavan" with Nayanthara doing a sexy dance number. Buddha will be tempted by Aishwarya & Nayanthara and he will resist and become a "Buddha". Climax will feature Simbu taking revenge of both the damsels. One of the damsel will runaway with Simbu's enemy and Simbu will get a Sombu.

C. Mel Gibson - Rajini Kanth aka "Sivagibson"

1. "Passion of the Christ" will be "Pasam of Raghavendra". The film will be directed by Shankar and will involve special effects involving flying cars, style getups and very young heroines who will be one third his age. Music is of course ARR. Movie's message is how Rajini is a saint.

2. "Signs" will be "Signomukhi". Rajini will add his supernatural style and power to defeat the ghosts of the signomukhi. Movie will have signatures dialogues , "LakaLakaLakaa" and "Enna Kodumai Idhu Saravanan Sir". Prabhu will as usual be the allakai for Rajini.

D. Tom Hanks - Kamalhassan aka "Tom HanKissssss"

1. "Cast Away" will be combined with "Dasavatharam". Kamal will act in 10 roles as a survivor in an island. There will be no other cast members except Vadivel. Instead of "Wilson", the famed foot ball, Kamal will have Vadivel. To up the tempo, Kamal will kiss vadivel in this movie. (Paavam vadivelu !!!)

2. "The Davinci Code" will be remade with "Virumandi". Kamal will be a rogue villager who goes on a quest to find the DaVinci code on his TVS-50 , all over the world. Kamal has vowed not to kiss anyone in this movie. (side effect of kissing vadivelu !!!)

E. Leonardo Di Caprio-Ramarajan aka "Leonardo di ramarajio"
1. "Titanic" will be dubbed as "Enga Ooru Kapalkaaran". Our superhero will try to stop the titanic from crashing on the iceberg by singing a song "Pechi..pechi nee perumai ulla pechi. Vaadi Vaadi ennudaya pechi". Titanic will slowly move away and climax will be a happy hero with lipstick.

2. "Catch Me If You Can" will be made as "Catch my karagam if u can". Heroine will be Kanaga and story will be about his karagam falling down and Kanaga trying to catch it. Santhabarathi will make attempts to get the karagam from his head and our hero will fight to save this.


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